


Hope is futile but sometimes you need it

by ThatBitch101



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: In the end, LATER, SO, and she might talk about it, and stuff, basically kara goes through horiffic things, but - Freeform, but she finds her family, but she get mind controled, but there will be supercorp, hardened kara, how to i tag, i dont wanna give away any plot points, idk i have no idea i have no plan for this man, isolate herself, just bc i think shes gonna like, just like, just please read it i crave validation, shes kara zor-el now, so like dont expect anything from me, there are no graphic depictions of rape or any excessive gore, traumatized kara, um
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-06-19 04:42:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15502539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatBitch101/pseuds/ThatBitch101
Summary: Kara underestimated everything before. Not anymore. Never again





	1. The Blur

At first she was winning. Winning the fight. She was fighting a new villain, someone that the Deo and Alex couldn't piece together much of a profile on, so she was being cautious, but not overly so, because no major physical damage had been caused as of yet. Physical, no word on phycological though. She was fighting, thinking that this was easy, why has no one caught this girl befo- 

 

and then, all at once

 

overwhelming fear. things blurred and stretched and… distorted, yeah that was the word, a Blank Blur of running, fighting, wait, why was she fighting those people, she liked those people, Blank again. Being in the back of a truck, loaded calm. Washing blood off her hands, why was there blood on her hands?? There always seemed to be these days. Why?  _ Blank again. _ Waking up bare in a bed full of people who were the least of her problems, powerless. Blur. Blur. Blank.

 

And then

 

Where was she going? Passing by dirt cells, being bound for one, in chains. Why could she think again? this was not normal. Wait for the blur to come. Where was it?! Don’t react… What was her name? Kara. Kara… Danvers? no, not right. Kara… Kara Zor-el? Better. Why?  _ where was the blur  _ Oh right, Krypton. Kryptonian. Rao. Oh fuck, No, RAO NO!! She needed to Escape, she Needed to-  _ Blankblurblurblur _

 

The next time, the first feeling was of clean. Lying on a bed. No restraints. Interesting. She was… in a lab. Why? danversKryptonOhRaoOHRAO, Running, Running, Frantic. Ow. oW! Shit! Woah. Woozy. Were these drugs? Definitely drugs. They Did something to her. Trying to get up. Falling. Falling. Failing. Ow. A different Kind of Blur, fake. Superficial was the word. Super. Heh! That was funny! Not really. 

 

Waving flaming swords, watching others fight and die, Wanting to get out, STOP CHEERING, It’s no use. Trapped, trapped in her mind now, Wait there was the Blur, NO- _ BlurBlankBlankBlurBlurBlur _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Awake Again. Trapped. Not in Her Mind. The dirt cell. Don’t fight them Kara, let them think you’re Not There. Maybe you can get out. 

 

Observe. No way to get out of the cell. Oh rao What have they done to her?! Rao. She didn’t know if rao existed at this point. Focus. Sometimes she was let out to watch the fights. That was the time to make a move. The fights OhRao OhRao. Fuck. Swearing. That felt good. She hadn’t done that Before. Now the only thing to do was wait. Evaluate.

 

She was hungry. No, starving. Wait, what if the drugs were in the food? The Blur, real or fake, was worse than starvation. Move away from the food then. Too tempting. Ow. That hurt. That was new. Or not! She remembered more! Oh rao maybe not such a good thing. She had to vomit now. Do it into the food. Ow. This was going to be very annoying.  _ Pain is supposed to be for humans _ . There was blood all over her. Dried blood. As if that was any better. She wondered why the real Blur wasn’t coming. The real Blur was connected to a person. That’s why. Maybe the person was busy. Gosh she was tired. Was sleep safe? Better not risk it. 

 

Be patient. Keep waiting. Patience. She used to be good at that. Before. Not so much now it seemed. Looking around. Wait, there were other people here! They all seemed very… unconcious. Another reason to get out. Should she plan? No, too tired to plan. Wait! Kara, don’t sleep! 

 

Well, maybe just lie down. Just… for a… for a second… so… tired.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara wakes up and makes some planning progress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY!! I told you I wasnt good at updating but I didnt say it enough, I'm so so sorry I have no excuse I'm just a lazy little shit, and also school I guess but IM SO SORRY AAAAAAAAAA I'm gonna try harder but have the lowest expectations possible I'm sorry also this one is super short but enjoy I guess

Awake.  _ Wish I wasn’t. _

 

Kara was moving. No, being dragged, handcuffed down the dirt hallway. The… prison hallway.  _ That seems right _ . 

  
  


Wait!

 

is the fight happening now, NO! No! nonono _ notimetoplan cantstandanother  _ Wait. Another cell. Handcuffs off.  _ Relief _ .

 

She needs to plan. Easier to think now, maybe hunger, maybe adrenaline, sharpening. Her wrists hurt. She rubs them. Absent. There was no kryptonite in those cuffs. Odd, they Did Something to her. How? In the lab! Yes, she remembers the lab! Bitter. Almost escaped in the lab. Aimless. She will do better this time. Plan. Right. Easily distracted. Stupid!

  
  


This wall has a crack in it. The other did not. Odd.

  
  


Then it hits her _ Panic OH Rao Oh RAO  _ Why _ Why me? Whywhowhat Ithinkimgonnadiehere whathaveIDONE  _ Panic.  _ Memory _ .

  
  
  


_ Panic later Zor-el. _ Plan now so she can panic later in luxury. Luxury. Haha! Not that funny. Plan now. Is she still strong?  _ Panic _ No, not strong, of course not. Not now. Not while shes in a cell.  _ Panic _ She was strong out there, waving the  _ fighters _ on.  _ PanicMemory _ Not bulletproof. Not even out there. Why?  _ Memory. _

  
  


Scars. She remembers the scars. Looks down. Still there. So many scars.  _ Panic _ Too many to count. Scars like stars. Haha!  _ Panic. RAO. _

 

She has a feeling she will never be bulletproof again. Lab. Bitter.  _ Panic _ A plan is starting to take shape. Hard to think now, with the panic.  _ Panic.  _ She thinks maybe her head is scarred too. On the inside.  _ Panic _ Plan. Right. Easily distracted. Stupid! 

 

Plan. When she gets dragged to wave the fighters on, before the  _ blur _ , she will attack. Plan.  _ Panic _ What if they attack back? Cant get any worse than this. Can it?!  _ Panic _ Plan. Attack and then run  _ or flyPanic if I can still do that _ as far as possible, as far as can be. Plan.

 

Freedom. Seems abstract now. Nothing will ever be like Before. Kara underestimated everything Before. Not anymore. Never again. No more Danvers. Zor-el now. Kryptonian.  _ Panic _ Maybe not Kryptonian anymore. Maybe something else, but definitely Zor-el. Zor-el feels good.

 

_ PanicPanicPanicPanic _

  
  


Plan? Plan.  _ Not a good plan. All shes got. _

  
  


_ Panic _

  
  


_ Panic _

 

_ Breathe _

  
  


_ Panic _

  
  


_ Panic _ Cant panic  _ Panic _ need to stay alert _ PanicPanicPanicPanic _ Cant Breathe _ PanicPanic _ Help _ PanicPanicPanic _ No ones coming

 

_ NoNoNoPanicNoNoNonononononnoPanicPanicPanicPanic _

She already knew that.

_ Panic _ Panic _ PanicCantBreathe ithinkimgonnadiehere _

  
  


Black. At least it's not blank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo, ye, that was it I guess, um, again sorry for vanishing, and also sorry for certain promises i made in the comments last time I'm very untrustworthy just ask my mom, but I'm just going to go vanish again, scream at me in the comments if you want to validate me

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I'm Ella, and my brain seems to come up with alot of sad things. Pls give me suggestions in the comments i need them i'm bad at this. Also, im bad at updating things, but i'll try my best! im sorry for this idk whats wrong with me but i promise it'll get better from here.
> 
> pls comment im an attention whore


End file.
